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Self-confidence, what should I do?

So much has already been said about self-confidence.

Some ideas that comes back frequently are:

  • Stay away from negativity and focus on positivity (who is still not doing it?)
  • Change your body language and image (not an easy one, physical activity helps)
  • See mistake as lesson not failure
  • Prepare more (so you’ll feel more confident in what you do/say)
  • Go back to the list of great things you’ve already achieved (works wonders when feeling down)

But confidence is not just about following some guidelines and miraculously finding it at the end of the road.

Confidence is a feeling you must feel, it is something you must believe in that is so strong that it will stay present and fight by your side when hard times come. Not just a fancy idea you have when all is well. I mean, it’s a good place to start but not where you are headed.

Those are my words to the unsteady you who is not quite sure she can be confident at all time. And who still believes she has to show great strength and know everything to be a confident woman. Here is my secret:

You are a confident woman when you doubt, you are a confident woman when you fear, you are a confident woman when you cry.

Confidence is not this absence of doubt. Forget it if it is what you believe. You will doubt. Oh yes believe me you will; but at the end of the day you will overcome the new challenges. Because you have this strength within you, you have this faith in you; you know you can do it. And that in itself is more powerful than anything else. What matters is not to know it all. What matters is to be able to look for solutions and be creative and open minded to find those new ideas, to heal a relationship that matters to you, to stand up for yourself in front of people, to say stop or no when times are needed. This is self confidence.

And from there come assertiveness, trust, self regard, and freedom .

Confidence is part of you the same way your hair is blond or your eyes are brown. It doesn’t matter what you are wearing, you are those things.

And I believe that you are confident, that you have this self confidence that creates miracle; and I will believe it very strongly until you do.

With love,

Floriane x